Systematic Chaos

Here we are,end of another week! A good feeling and time for some bevvies. Had another b/day yesterday, and I still think every year-what have I achieved in my life. Apart from the birth of 2 great kids-not much!! I have worked in a variety of jobs,and done my best to excel at all of them,yet seem unfulfilled yet. Do I want to keep doing this, or do something which will be more to my calling? I feel I have wasted my musical abilities-do I follow these and use them for good or evil hehe Or do I look another direction and study to help people more-in the fields of spirituality,healing or counselling which all hold attractions to me? At 41 ,I feel no closer to knowing my true calling then I did at 16....
On another note,I am anticipating seeing my beautiful girl again at Easter,and that keeps me propelled towards next weekend!! Yay!! And after that,the organising and stress that goes with moving again-to a new beginning with my gf. I feel sad for my daughter,whom I am leaving here,but know she is always taken care of,and that she will be visiting  and I will still get to see her smiling face and feel that connection I've had with her since she opened her eyes as a wee baby.Her mum spoils her too much-but I can see a sensitive,caring young woman emerging and it tugs at my heartstrings knowing all the growing up she has to do,and the resulting turmoils and triumphs she will be dealing with. I hope she never feels the sense of hopelessness and loneliness I did as a child growing up,growong up in a world still stuck in old fashioned ideals of how a boy should act and be,Granted she is a girl lol and will find it somewhat different!! But that in itself brings forth many challenges-But I feel she will be ok.
Life is what you make it they say-well I'm gonna make it happy!!! I will love my gf and create a new life-bringing a maturity that will overrun any previous challenges i"ve had in my relationships previously. And forge a new path of fulfillment and wellbeing-for both of us,by just working together and following our hearts.I can't wait to get started!!!

A mother had her forehead tattooed with the web address of a gambling site after auctioning off advertising space on her head to pay for her son's school fees.
Karolyne Smith with her Goldenpalace.com logo
Karolyne Smith has to live with a permanent billboard on her forehead after she accepted Goldenpalace.com's offer of $10,000 for the 'advertising space'. She needed the money to send her son Brady to a private school.

Karolyne said: ""I really want to do this. To everyone else, it seems like a stupid thing to do. To me, $10,000 is like a million dollars."

"I only live once and I'm doing it for my son. It's a small sacrifice to build a better future for my son."

Karolyne did not take the decision lightly. She discussed it for more than three weeks with her boyfriend Jeremy Williams.

Smith's eBay auction attracted more than 27,000 hits and 1,000 watchers. Bidding reached $999.99 before Goldenpalace.com, an Internet gambling company met Smith's $10,000 asking price. Goldenpalace.com also gave her another $5,000 for her trouble.

Another person, inspired by Karolyne is currently auctioning his forehead as ad space on ebay.

Just survived a weekend with my lovely daughter who is 12 going on 25.Well actually it was just saturday afternoon and sunday. Amongst watching the whole season of Summer Heights High,pillow fights that i lost and endless payouts i wound up feeling exhausted by Sunday night!!! It was good though and i'm happy she can be relaxed and be herself around dear old dad(as she keeps reminding me,in between pulling hairs off my nose with tweezers and commenting on my grey hairs popping up!)I have been talking to her about the move and she is showing interest in the new area my love and I will be living in and the various things we'll be able to do and see.And my gf has been posting songs on Facebook(as I have) that my daughter has shown great interest in and even requesting copies of said music and cd's. So I think after the initial sadness when I do leave she will be ok once she comes over and sees how happy we are and that she is always welcome to visit.And I thank my beautiful gf for being so accepting of her and understanding how important it is to keep the bonds we share. In many many ways my gf is such a beautiful person i can't comprehend how lucky I am to be with her and enjoy her warm loving presence in my life.:)